Story Time
I remember it like it was yesterday. Halloween 2009. I was in 7thgrade and had just moved to Cranston. I say moved; I should say forcefully relocated. Not that Warwick was much better, but I missed my friends. Mama never let me do anything fun, but this year was going to be different. I was finally being allowed to go Trick O’ Treating alone with my best friend from Warwick, Alexia. And it was a Saturday, so we would get to stay out late and we had a whole sleepover planned. I was determined to make this night happen no matter what. Except, the nasty little swine got me.
Yup, that’s right. I’m talking about swine flu. Don’t ask me how I got it because I really don’t know. My whole family made fun of me for months, calling me ‘pig girl.’ (Get it? Because swine is a virus pigs get.) I fought it as hard as I could my mama saw right through my shenanigans. Dr. Bradley got called first thing, 9:02 to be exact. By 9:30, we were on our way to the office and my whole world was falling apart. I knew there was no way mama would let me go out now.
My costume was my favorite costume ever up to this point in my Trick O’ Treating. I was going as the devil! (No coincidence I suppose that now, 10 years later my license plate is IS-666) The costume was a tight, red velour dress that was purposely disheveled at the bottom, complete with a horned tail, and a set of ears to match. My costume was all I could think about as we waited for the doctor.
“Well, I have some bad news Allison. You’ve got the swine flu. We’re giving you medication, but you need to stay home tonight.”
I remember instantaneously sobbing, right there in front of the doctor. Truth be told, I cared more about Trick O’ Treating at that point than I did about my own health. (A little pathetic now that I think about it) But Mama don’t mess around, and naturally I was forced to stay in the confines of my bedroom.
Now the story gets a little funny. (It wasn’t funny then though)
We go home and I take my medicine and go to bed. What else did I have to live for anyway? I was Pig Girl now. I wake up from my Sad Nap and can’t see too well. I find my glasses, but I still can’t see. I head to the bathroom and turn on the light and –
“AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”
My mom comes running down the hallway, screaming “WHAT WHAT WHAT!”
“MY F*****G FACE!!!!”
She couldn’t even be mad at me for the vulgarity because my eyes were practically swollen shut, my lips three times their normal size, and a bumpy rash ALLover.
“We’re going to the hospital!” More instantaneous sobbing. I’ve always hated hospitals.
We get to Hasbro and there’s SO many people. So many people in fact that I’m forced to wear a mask so as not to infect them all. Embarrassing to say the least but not as embarrassing as my face looked.
Mama and I waited for hours. And hours. And hours. Until finally we get called to the back. When we get back there, the nurse does the normal work up and sends for the doctor. Doctor comes in, tells me I need a shot. I hate shots. I hate needles. In comes 3 nurses to hold me down so the doctor can give me a shot. IN MY BUTT. Embarrassed. Mortified. I remember screaming, “WHY CAN’T YOU JUST GIVE ME SOME BENADRYL?!”
Turns out I was severely allergic to the medication my primary care gave me and needed to fight off the Pig Girl flu on my own.
After all the hours of waiting, we were sent away from the butt fiasco within 20 minutes. We picked up my brother who got to go out for Halloween with my uncle.
This Halloween will make it 10 years since that fateful night. The best part of it all was that it has a happy ending. (Despite the fact that I was scarred for life from that shot) My brother felt bad that I was really sick and shared all his candy with me. He didn’t even care 2 days later when he got sick too. We stayed up all night together, watching movies and eating candy.
THE END
THE END
Wow! This made me laugh. Also, my jaw dropped several times. I really like the ending, too (your poor brother though...and poor you! :/). I love how you took a challenging, not-fun (especially given the timing) situation and made it into this refreshingly entertaining and "real" piece of writing. Thank you :)
ReplyDeleteNice job going back and forth in time--I liked the bit about the license plate. My only quibble: I don't think you need to tell us when the story gets funny--if we can't figure that out, you don't deserve us!
ReplyDeleteYou put a lot of personality in this piece. It was funny--although I felt bad for laughing at your misfortune lol. You come out of present and past tense a couple times but overall it was a really entertaining piece. :)
ReplyDeleteI've so been there with the perfect Halloween costume not working out. Not even remotely close to how it happened to you, but I can empathize with your disappointment. Poor you!
ReplyDeleteAllison, this is a really funny story besides the fact that you were really sick! I remember that time distinctly because the swine flu was a new thing and everyone was panicking! I'm so sorry that you were one of the unlucky ones! I'm sorry that you had to go through this, but I'm happy your brother was kind and shared his candy. Maybe you can dress up as a devil this Halloween to celebrate 10 years since the incident! ;)
ReplyDeleteNEVER apologize for feeling bad about missing out on Trick-or-Treating! There are fewer more devastating things for a child to suffer missing out on. It only happens once a year and you only get to participate so many number of times. And I can't say that I blame you for trying to hide your sickness until after. When you're a kid on Halloween night, you don't even care about getting hit by passing cars when free candy is on the line. The only thing that I would offer constructively for your piece though, is to include the AM or PM for your times (you forgot that crucial little detail).
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